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Pardon me for having a random mental breakdown here, but I hate customer service! Please, please, can I go back to journalism? Someone give me a friggin' break here. I am going literally insane.

Okay, okay, much calmer now.

Let me tell you what has been happening at my job. Feel free to ZZZZZZZ, oops, what's that sound? Oh, it was just me, snoring. Sorry for the boring post, but my job is booooooorrrrrrrrrrriinnnngggggg!!!!!!!!

About three weeks ago I was asked to go into a temporary role on a project. Our power company providers retail electricity for a network company and while it's all regulated by the government (which is a big laugh considering the electricity prices in this country, regulated my ass!) each network has its choice about whether it gives its customers shares or dividends. Our network company pays out a dividend each year based on the profits. And it paid out a month ago.

Okay, fine. So I'm asked to take the calls from people who either a) want to know what's happened to their dividend, b) want to know why they haven't got a dividend, c) think they're entitled to a dividend and aren't, d) think they're entitled to a dividend because they paid for a share of the power but moved out before the rollover date.

If the answer is all of the above, I don't fucking care!!!! Sorry, I've been majorly stressed out, which is why I've been focusing on the one story which makes me feel good at the moment because I've been doing lots of overtime at work and writing has been the only thing keeping me sane! I swear, I have barely turned on my television in three weeks.

Big plus is Smallville is back and I can at least watch that, and save my brains leaking out. But I digress.

Anyway, back to the job. I swear, the callers on this dividend project have to be the biggest morons on the planet! I have never heard such stupidity in my life before? Like one caller rings up and says, "I've got my dividend cheque, but I don't have a .... bank account. Can I cash the cheque?"
"No, moron, you have to bank it in your own bank account."
"Oh, so how do I do that?"
Can I say it, please, please can I say: "Duh, go to your bank, walk inside the doors, fill out the deposit slip, wait in line, then give it to the teller."
"So you mean I can't cash it?"
"No, it's not transferable."
"What does that mean?"
"It means you have to bank it in your bank account."
"Oh, can I give it to someone else to put it in their bank account?"
Headdesk. What's that banging sound? Oh it's just Leanne dealing with a fucking idiot again.

Okay, so maybe all the conversations didn't quite go down like that but that's the gist of the more idiotic ones. Then I get the ones like this: 

"I've been paying the power at that address for 25 years, now you're saying I can't get the dividend cheque because I moved out before the .... of August?"
"Yes, that's exactly what I'm saying."
"Well, that's not fair!"
"It's not a question of what's fair, it's how the process works."
"Well, I don't think it's fair. I'm going to go to Fair Go (consumer rights tv programme)"
"Fine, you do that, and allow me to snigger in the background while they laugh in your face"

Okay, not really. I'd like to think I was a professional when it came to answering that, so I just don't comment.

And here's the doozy. My ex-flatmate emails me and goes, have you received the dividend? (For the old place)
No, I'm not getting the dividend for the old place, I'm getting it for my new place, because I opened a power account right before the rollover. Just because you're too lazy to call the power company the day I move out and get the power in your name, don't expect me to chase it up for you. And why do I get the feeling that she now expects me to share the dividend for my new place because she didn't get one for the place I moved out of? Three words for you my friend: No fucking way! I need the money more than you do, Miss I get more money than you and I can rub it in your face and laugh at you because you're starving and here I am buying expensive meals. Sorry, me being miss grumpy pants, but you can see why I moved out.

I'm back in my old post, which is taking orders for magazine subscriptions and sorting out customer issues. And you know what? I'm tired of trying to fix everybody else's fuck ups and customers blaming me for it. But at least I'm getting recognition for the amount of work I do. We get faxes and emails as well as calls. And one of my senior CSRs said to me "I've seen the amount of calls you take and you do a shitload of work around here". Yes, I complain about the lack of staff, but only because I feel bad for my TL Agnes and my friend Janet who both do a shitload of work themselves and never seem to get ahead. That's because they're too busy taking calls. The rest of the staff just aren't able to do what we do (no offence to any of them but one needs to grow a brain and the other finds the emails are just too complicated). It's no wonder I'm so tired!

Okay, now that I've bored you with my rant, I'll let you go back to your regular programming LOL.


( 7 comments — Leave a comment )
Oct. 16th, 2010 01:32 am (UTC)
*pets you*

Sorry, sweetie! People can be such eejits sometimes. :-)
Oct. 16th, 2010 02:29 am (UTC)
I know, right? I really do wonder about people sometimes. I didn't mention the dirty old men who would ask if I was single because I sounded so pleasant and polite over the phone. Ewww!!
Oct. 16th, 2010 02:05 am (UTC)
Eek, that sounds awful. I worked in a grocery store for too many years, and I can sympathize with the rude, idiots out there. Nice people were so rare, that I'd tell my husband about them when I got home. It didn't happen often. I sympathize so much, and wish there was something I could do to help. {{Hugs}}
Oct. 16th, 2010 02:30 am (UTC)
You already help my friend, with your wonderful stories. You and Dee - trust me, you guys are my stress relief.
Oct. 16th, 2010 08:46 am (UTC)
sorry to hear that honey. *big hugs*
Oct. 16th, 2010 09:27 am (UTC)
One day Jan, one day I swear I'm going to find the money and I will be so there, on your doorstep, with duty free booze in hand and you and I can get trolleyed and get up to all sorts of shenanigans, LOL and I can kiss that rotten job goodbye, like see ya later alligator, know what I mean?
Oct. 16th, 2010 09:37 am (UTC)
I definitely know what you mean honey!
( 7 comments — Leave a comment )

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